Master The Art Of Acquiescence For Resilience & Perspective

Master The Art Of Acquiescence For Resilience & Perspective

A murder at 5AM in Brooklyn ended one man’s life and changed another’s forever. The man whose life was changed was Derrick Hamilton. Just 17 years old, he was arrested for the murder. This was terrifying for Derrick, because he did not commit the murder. He thought that the truth would come out in the trial. It did not. 

 

The judge refused witness testimony of the one person who could prove his innocence. He was convicted and sentenced to 25 years in prison. Derrick appealed the case and did so successfully, but just eight months later there was a terrible Deja vu. Again, he was arrested for murder. And again, he was wrongly convicted for life. 

 

This time, he began to study law in prison, and he did so with determination. He read law books cover to cover. He studied his own case, but also the cases of dozens of other wrongly convicted inmates. Although three decades of his life were taken from him, he was able to help countless others with his hard-earned legal expertise. His sentence was eventually overturned. Today, he is free. 

 

Most people would have taken their settlement and rode off into the sunset. But not Derrick. He’s known not only as the most prolific jailhouse lawyer, but he’s now regarded as one of the most effective criminal justice reformers in America. Through his efforts, he is responsible for the release of approximately one hundred wrongly convicted people. He gave them their lives back. He continues this fight today. 

 

When asked in an interview how he got over the anger, Derrick responded, “I never said I got over the anger. What I did was channel the anger into something else.”

 

In this article

 

Derrick’s story embodies a fundamental concept of Stoicism called The Art of Acquiescence. In this article, we’ll define The Art of Acquiescence. We’ll also explore why and how to use The Art of Acquiescence along the lines of resilience, efficiency, and perspective. 

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Female athlete clearing a hurdle to represent an article about The Art of Acquiescence

What is The Art of Acquiescence? 

 

The Art of Acquiescence is a concept from Stoicism that teaches us to accept things that are beyond our control rather than fighting them. It is not, however, passive acceptance. It is not giving up. The Art of Acquiescence is accepting the obstacle so that we can find another way around

 

Resilience and The Art of Acquiescence

 

Derrick Hamilton’s story is compelling and relevant to The Art of Acquiescence for several reasons, but one in particular stands out. He obviously had to accept that his freedom—his life—had been taken away. This was out of his control. But he did not accept it passively. He wasted no time sinking into dark depression. He did not retaliate with aggression or hatred. Instead, he channeled his energy into something he believed: proving his innocence. He found another way around. 

 

Resilience is about rebounding quickly from setbacks. This is closely related to The Art of Acquiescence, because we cannot begin to move forward if we are stuck resisting something bad that has already happened. Usually, we can’t even see the way forward until we have accepted that we have been blocked. So, The Art of Acquiescence is about accepting when things go wrong so we can move on and move on with clearer vision. 

Memento mori life tracker

Efficiency and The Art of Acquiescence

 

There’s a concept in economics and investing called Sunk Cost Fallacy. This is when an investor continues to hold onto, or even throw more money into, a failing investment. The sunk cost fallacy leads the investor down an illogical path: I’ve already spent so much, so this has to work. I’ll keep at it

 

Smart investors don’t fall for sunk cost bias. They know exactly when to exit a failing investment, and they adhere to their own rules strictly, regardless of how bad it feels to take a loss. Again, this is The Art of Acquiescence.

 

We need to avoid sunk cost bias by accepting losses in our own lives and moving on from them. This applies to all kinds of things: relationships, diets, jobs, general uncertainty, but also myriads of mundane losses and setbacks. Accepting a bad break, no matter how bad it is, prevents us from wasting more precious time and energy dwelling on it or resisting it. 

Female athlete jumping over a hurdle to represent an article about The Art of Acquiescence

Accept that you cannot be amazing at everything

 

Another way to apply The Art of Acquiescence is by deciding to limit what you’ll be great at. This has been a fairly recent realization in my own life. There are many hats that I wear. Obviously, I write this blog, so writing and my philosophical practices associated with it are things I want to be great at. In addition, I have a full-time career, so this blog is really a side project for the moment. I’m serious about exercise. I’m serious about meditation. My family is the most important thing—in fact, at the time of writing, I’m about two weeks away from becoming a father. 

 

I realized that I’m not going to be great at all of these things. At best, I can be great at two of them. That’s it. I think we’re led to believe that we can and should be amazing at dozens of things. But there’s that old saying: Jack of all trades, master of none

 

Social media probably doesn’t help. Its feeds are optimized to show us what we’re interested in. My feeds show me exercise, meditation, Stoicism, writing, and more. It shows me people being amazing at these things. The result is I internalize that I should also be amazing at all of these things, because I care about all of them. My interpretation of The Art of Acquiescence tells me that I should choose one or two things at most to really focus on. For everything else, I can accept that I will be merely good or OK. 

Perspective and The Art of Acquiescence

 

Practicing The Art of Acquiescence requires (and builds) a wider perspective. Accepting the roll of the dice leaves no room for blame or aversion to accountability. Blame is not compatible with The Art of Acquiescence, because it keeps us stuck on the problem. We need the right perspective (or Right View as it’s commonly referred to in the context of the Noble Eightfold Path) to see beyond the problem. What lies beyond the problem is the solution. 

 

“Where the head goes, the body follows. Perception precedes action. Right action follows the right perspective.”

– Ryan Holiday, The Obstacle Is The Way

 

There are even rare cases where we can use the problem to our advantage. When Derrick Hamilton was arrested under his first wrongful murder charge, he was 17. He says that he was a teenage product of his environment—certainly not committing murder, but involved in minor illegal activities. Fast forward through his three-decade-long struggle in prison and with the justice system, and now he teaches law at Cardozo School of Law in New York. 

 

Final thoughts

 

The Art of Acquiescence is simple: accept the bad so that you can move past it. The faster we do this, the better. Loss, failure, and mistakes can be brutal, so practice The Art of Acquiescence with compassion for yourself. You shouldn’t numb yourself or become a machine. Feeling the pain is part of the process. If you don’t feel the sting, then you’re not awake. You must be awake and aware to learn from the loss—to grow from it and see new perspectives. 

 

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How To Focus On The Process

How To Focus On The Process

The outcome is the obstacle. When fixation on the desired outcome obscures focus on the task at hand, errors occur. Conversely, if our actions are not clouded by oversight, but executed with care, lightheartedness, and undivided attention, then we travel a much clearer path toward the outcome. This article aims to provide answers to the question ‘How to focus on the process?’. I’ll share some personal observations, but also provide some practical focus tips to improve undivided attention. I’ve also collected several science-based tips shown to enhance focus. We’ll discuss how process focus affects performance and look at how to focus on the process and not the outcome. The true aim of this piece is not to help us achieve more, but to help us realize the innate beauty of a life unobstructed by harmful grasping onto desired outcomes.

A dictionary-style definition of the terms 'process focus' and 'outcome focus'

My job often demands flawless execution, but of course like everyone, I make mistakes. I recently took some time to analyze my mistakes, non-judgmentally, and I noticed a few common threads connecting the majority of my errors. Here are the three common undercurrents of my mistakes: 

 

  1. I rush
  2. I doubt myself 
  3. During the action, I say to myself ‘don’t make a mistake’ 

 

Process over results

 

When I analyzed these three circumstantial commonalities of error in my own work, I came to the conclusion that they all share one fundamental cause: lack of process focus. Let’s take rushing for example. If you think about it, rushing is the embodiment of outcome focus. Rushing is caused by a desire to be somewhere else or to be doing something else. Doubting oneself is a manifestation of fear—fear rooted in over-attachment to the outcome, or the fear of failing to get there. 

 

This is why delivering a presentation alone in your living room is far less of a burden than delivering the same presentation in front of colleagues. It’s the same action, but the latter lends itself to fear of the outcome. The last of my three signposts of error, saying to myself ‘don’t make a mistake’, is a distraction. These words entering my mind are brought there by looking ahead to the desired outcome and attaching to it a great importance, which detracts focus from what I’m actually doing. 

 

It’s clear that lack of process focus can cloud our attention and lead to mistakes. But what can we do about it? 

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Memento mori life tracker

How to focus on the process two personal observations

 

1. Don’t scan, savor – In this age of information, where our devices are flooded with new content daily, we’ve developed a tendency to scan for the bits that interest us most. Most websites and social platforms are designed to allow us to scan and still get what we want. This habit of scanning is fine on Instagram, but when it comes to true focus, whether it’s learning to play a musical instrument, writing a report, or even listening to a family member, it can expose us to error. 

 

I like to use an analogy to help combat scanning—that of reading your favorite novel. Imagine yourself settled into a cozy nook, hot cup of something at your side, immersed in your favorite book. Your reading will be slow and pleasurable. You will savor each word, from left to right, line by line. The book is so captivating that you wouldn’t dare skip a line, much less an entire paragraph. 

Read everything like a good book

 

Bring this slow and deliberate reading to your work. Much of the information we consume is software based, and practically designed for our eyes to skip around the page. Don’t skip or scan, but simply read all the information slowly and carefully, from left to right, line by line. It takes only a few seconds longer than scanning, but it provides full context, and ensures you won’t miss anything critical.

 

  1. Pointing and calling – I first read about the pointing and calling method in James Clear’s bestselling book Atomic Habits. The method, famously used in the ultra-efficient rail network in Japan, consists of a person literally pointing at what they are about to act upon, and then calling out the action aloud. 

 

I found this to be strikingly clever. I realized immediately how well this method could transfer to information-based work. The cursor on the computer is perfect for pointing. Calling can be done aloud or internally. I am copying x information and pasting it into y document. Perform. I am analyzing x column of data to isolate y variable. Perform. I am about to meet with x person to discuss y. Perform.

 

Another truism about process focus is that its advantages are evident in both success and failure. If we look back at major accomplishments, we realize that they are not a snapshot in time, but an accumulation of countless small actions performed well. Similarly, when we look back at our failures, we can often identify and isolate one or more actions that were flawed, thereby contributing to the negative outcome. 

Man jumping over barrels representing an article on how to focus on the process

How to focus on the process – Science-based focus tips 

 

The following focus tips come to us from Dr. Andrew Huberman, professor of neurobiology and ophthalmology at Stanford University. More specifically, they come from his two-hour podcast episode Focus Toolkit: Tools to Improve Your Focus & Concentration, which I highly recommend watching in its entirety.

 

Here are a few bullet-style tips to help you improve your focus: 

 

  • Binaural beats, at a frequency of 40 Hz, have shown to enhance focus and decrease the amount of time it takes to get into a focused state. Avoid using binaural beats for your entire focus period. Try using them for five minutes before you begin to focus or to reduce distraction in noisy environments. There are many apps or you can find binaural beats on YouTube for free.
  • Leverage your body’s natural ultradian rhythms and block out periods of about 90 minutes for intensely focused sessions. Don’t expect to enter into deep focus right away. It takes five to ten minutes to settle in. Towards the end, spend 10-30 minutes to deliberately defocus.
  • Try a cold shower to increase epinephrine and dopamine in the brain and body. This will help the body get into a focused state. The positive effects of epinephrine last up to an hour or more.
  • Regular meditation practice has shown to have proven benefits for our ability to focus. Huberman cites a study in which participants meditated, using a form of meditation called concentration meditation, for 13 minutes per day. These participants had measurably higher levels of focus compared to the control group who did not meditate. 
  • Using our visual field can improve focus. Set a timer for 30 seconds and focus on one object during this time. This is a good way to begin your 90-minute focus sessions.

 

The true importance of process focus 

 

When we contemplate the finite nature of life, as the Stoics prescribed, then we realize that treating certain actions as mere stepping stones to something greater plays right into something we are all trying to avoid: life passing us by. 

 

It is true that by dedicating ourselves fully to each action we actually perform better, but this is not the chief argument for doing so. We should strive to wash our dishes and do our laundry with deliberate care because these actions are life itself

 

Most imagery in mindfulness teachings shows us the sunset or the quiet moment with a loved one. But it’s critical to note that driving to work or taking out the trash are no less precious than the majesty of the setting sun or the connection of a family dinner. In fact, I would argue that these mundane or even unpleasant actions are where our mindfulness practice is most required.

Outcomes are obvious

 

You may think that letting go of the outcome will weaken you. By not having clear and constant reminders of your goals, you will not achieve them. But the thing about most outcomes is that they’re pervasive. Our society is practically constructed to give us constant reminders of who we need to be and where we need to go. Your work has built-in measures of success and performance reviews. Yes, you need plans and goals, but allow yourself to elaborate these with care and lightheartedness. Once you have a plan, you need not obsess over the outcome because it is always there. Thinking about the desired outcome won’t get you any closer to it, only the plethora of minor and mundane actions leading to it will. Nurturing these small acts not only yields better performance, but it affords us the preciousness of the present moment. 

The present moment is an evergreen opportunity 

 

Focusing on process over results, especially with the smallest of tasks, can amount to greater outcomes when we are not misguided by obsession over those outcomes. Approaching each action with care is a noble pursuit of life itself. Finally, fixating on an outcome can make us miss opportunities because our perspective is so narrow and confined to one rigid outcome. This narrow perspective of focusing solely on the outcome also stifles creativity and greatly restricts the ability to realize new possibilities and recognize opportunities. 

 

But perhaps the most powerful aspect of a given moment is that it represents an opportunity to reset. I’d like to end on this note, because this noble pursuit of granting care and attention to the ‘minor’ details in life will come with its setbacks. You will lose focus at times and you will find yourself working on the outcome instead of the task. When this happens, do not become frustrated. Simply notice that you’ve strayed from the path, smile, and refocus. This is why mindfulness and meditation are the key, as they teach us not to strive for unfaltering focus, but to enjoy the pursuit of focus—to recognize when we have lost focus and regain it promptly and without angst. 

 

“Life happens when we are busy making plans” – Allen Saunders

 

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step” – Lao Tzu

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