They say sitting is the new smoking. But how can this be? Our bodies are highly evolved survival machines. We emerged as the dominant species on this planet not in small part because we can run long distances. We can maneuver through and manipulate our environment in sophisticated ways. Surely our bodies can handle sitting in a chair. Of course, the act of resting our asses on a seat is not harmful. It’s only harmful when we sit for eight, ten, even fourteen hours a day. This is excessive. This is the opposite of the virtue of temperance.
What is temperance in Stoicism?
The ancient Stoics gave us their 4 Stoic Virtues, one of which is temperance. The Stoics describe temperance as moderation and active resistance against anything that is harmful in excess. Essentially, temperance is balance.
I’d like to take a deep dive into the virtue of temperance, because finding balance in life is a central pursuit of this blog. In this article, I’ll attempt to share practical tips and strategies for applying temperance to areas of life that I feel are susceptible to harmful excess: decision making, time management, and work life balance.
What did the Stoics say about temperance?
In a passage of Meditations about dealing with other peoples’ shamelessness, Marcus Aurelius wrote:
“What qualities has nature given us to counter that defect? As an antidote to unkindness it gave us kindness. And other qualities to balance other flaws.”
He’s saying that there are always two sides of every coin. Exercising the virtue of temperance can be as simple as looking to the opposite of what’s excessive. Is there too much inactivity in your life because of your office job? The simple antidote is the opposite: exercise. Do you work too hard? The simple antidote is true, mindful rest.
Related article: Ambitious Habit Energy & Finding Rest Anywhere
How to practice the virtue of temperance
Two birds with one stone: practicing temperance with time management
Our mortality is both the source of life’s greatest fears and life’s greatest beauty. Our limited time on earth is a defining human characteristic that we all share. We must not squander our time with cheap and frivolous entertainment, nor can we allow the sharp edge of productivity to shave it all away.
This is an incredibly difficult balance to strike—one that requires temperance.
Capitalism is an effective testing and training ground for one’s self-actualization, but we all know there are more important areas of life that cannot be measured by market value: connection with others, quiet time to reflect, creativity without a desired material outcome, etc.
One strategy that I use in an attempt to marry my desire to be successful with my desire to live a mindful and healthy life is finding activities that support both goals simultaneously. I used to love playing organized sports, even as an adult. I also used to love lifting weights at the gym. As my work responsibilities grew (less free time) and my cost of living increased suddenly (greater expenses) when I moved to a very expensive city, I had to make changes to mitigate these losses. I also noticed that my office job was creating an imbalance in terms of excessive time spent indoors. I used to run occasionally, but just as a sort of necessary chore of maintaining cardiovascular fitness.
Stack habits and behaviors to serve multiple purposes
Here, I found myself with the following requirements at the same time: recreational competition, physical exercise, saving money, and more fresh air. So, I decided to become a trail runner to meet all of these needs simultaneously. I realized that by signing up for some tough long-distance trail races, I was creating a fun challenge for myself in a competitive sport, while saving money and gaining more time outdoors by saying goodbye to the gym.
The Mindful Stoic blog is another example of this ‘killing two birds’ methodology, albeit one that I had not considered when I started the blog.
The company I work for places a very high value on writing skills. When we have new ideas, we always develop and present them in writing. Although the content and style of writing is very different between this blog and my day job, I am most likely practicing the written word a lot more than my colleagues who don’t own and operate a blog as a hobby.
Also, writing about mindfulness and Stoicism helps me keep these practices top of mind. Writing about these practices not only provides me with a creative outlet, but it’s also helped them really take root in my life.
The ‘killing-two-birds method’ tenets
- The activity should meet or support multiple needs or objectives at one time.
- The activity must be done for the love of the activity itself.
- If there is a measurable outcome, you should still ‘win’ even if the outcome is not successful.
- The activity should allow you to get better at something you can use in other areas of life.
Designing our leisure activities and hobbies in this way allows us to practice temperance when it comes to managing our finite time and balancing ambition with mindful living.
Sure, with enough discipline and habit building, we could spend all of our waking hours working, studying and striving toward some material end. But, there’s more to being human than producing and getting rewarded for it on the market. So, finding healthy hobbies that we truly love doing for the sake of it, but with a little flavor of useful support in other areas of life, is one way to maximize our time.
How to practice the virtue of temperance with decision making
A simple technique for practicing temperance regarding difficult decisions is to quickly identify at least one alternative. For any decision that involves internal conflict, try to think of at least one better alternative early in the process, leaving you with at least two options.
This technique is especially helpful when it comes to cravings or decisions motivated by fatigue or passivity. Here’s a hypothetical situation to help illustrate: after a long day of work, you discover that food in the fridge is in low supply. The idea of going to the nearest fast food restaurant strikes you, but you also know it is not a healthy option. Now is the moment to quickly identify an alternative. You could also go to the grocery store and pick up something quick and easy to prepare. The grocery store option will be cheaper and healthier.
Quickly identifying an alternative does something significant. Instead of allowing your tired mind to wrestle with the sole option of satisfying fast food, your brain now has another outlet. Urges and temptations are most powerful when there are no other options presented, or when the other options don’t satisfy the underlying need. This approach allows us to practice temperance when it comes to all kinds of conflicting decisions.
There is always a middle path
Here are a few more examples of identifying alternatives to practice temperance with decision making:
I’m incredibly tired today, so exercising is probably not a good idea.
Some stretching or yoga will do the trick.
These t-shirts have a buy-2-get-1-free deal.
One is cheaper than two, and I really only need one.
I wonder if I should cut carbs entirely from my diet, but I’ve found conflicting research.
Cutting down on carbs by 40-50% is a sensible compromise.
I’ve been presented with an interesting investment idea, but I’m worried I’ll lose my money.
Define your risk tolerance, i.e. how much money you can tolerate losing, and invest only that much.
I should eat less sugar.
Make a rule for yourself. Decide that you simply will not eat products with more than 20g of sugar per 100g serving.
The powerful aftereffect that accompanies this technique is that by choosing the more positive alternative, sometimes we gain a second wind and end up snowballing with the good behavior. To take the above exercise example, you may successfully negotiate some stretching rather than sitting on the couch, and you may end up feeling great doing the stretching to the point that you regain the desire to exercise more rigorously.
At the very least, you will feel good about having done something, leaving you in a better mood and therefore in a better mindset for the following day. To take the above investing example, you have a zero percent chance of profiting by doing nothing, but by taking a calculated risk, you can reap the rewards if there is a positive return and only suffer a tolerable loss if the return is negative.
Practicing the virtue of temperance with work-life balance
Work life balance has become somewhat of a cliché topic. But, an idea only becomes a cliché if it’s repeated in the culture. If it’s repeated in the culture, then there’s undoubtedly some truth or value behind it. Finding balance in all areas of life is a central theme of this blog, and work life balance is certainly a major part of that.
We all know someone who suffers in life because they let fear or plain laziness prevent them from working and they struggle to meet their needs.
Conversely, we all know someone who works too hard and then suffers in their relationships or health. We must practice the virtue of temperance by balancing between excessive work and excessive passivity.
Work is not just about monetary gain, either. When done in correct proportions and environments, work can provide a sense of pride, challenges that lead to personal growth, and some mental stimulus that keeps our brains healthy.
Here are some practices I find helpful for striking a balance between work and mindful living:
Work life balance tenets
- You must accept the fact that you will never finish. There will always be work left undone at the end of the day. You need to be able to embrace this and shut off at the day’s end. Related article: How To Switch Off After Work.
- Be wary of technology and turn it off. My grandfather was an incredibly hard worker. But, he never had to contend with email at any hour in any place.
- Don’t compare yourself to others and don’t place value on working long hours. Strive to be more efficient than your competition and don’t worry if it appears as if you’re working less.
- Out of sight out of mind. Place work related objects in a drawer, closet or separate room at the end of the day.
- Acknowledge that a job that’s 100% enjoyable is practically non-existent. The grass is not always greener on the other side, so always attempt to find the good in what you do, accept and overcome the bad before making major changes.
- Bring structure and organization to your life outside of work. You have project trackers, schedules, and monthly reviews for your work. But, do you have such mechanisms for your family life? We often say ‘I should spend more time with family’, but how often do we apply our organizational and time management skills to ensure that quality time actually happens? Related article: Your Core Values: Turning Good Intentions Into Good Results
- Be acutely aware of the distinction between rest and work. When you begin working, say to yourself ‘now I am working’. When you finish work, say to yourself ‘now I am resting’. All too often we transition from work to rest mindlessly, allowing our work energy and stress to follow us when it should be left where it belongs. Mindfulness is incredibly simple yet powerful.
Final thoughts
Temperance, moderation, and balance are elusive. You can find philosophy and religion attempting to guide people to a middle path all throughout history. Any time we see consistency across cultures and throughout history when it comes to ideas, it’s a good indication that the idea is worth exploring.
I’ve attempted here to write practically about practicing the Stoic virtue of temperance with time management, decision making, and work life balance. I chose these three areas because I feel they lend themselves to the magnetism, often created by culture, that pulls us away from the middle path. But, these are not the only areas in which the virtue of temperance is needed.
Look for any excess in your life and find ways of applying the virtue of temperance to counterbalance it. Take some time to identify these areas of excess, ideally on paper in a journal, and come up with your own strategies and techniques. The world is a chaotic and evolving place to navigate, but the ability to walk a straight line, never losing sight of the middle path, is certainly an advantage that we should afford to ourselves.