It was a clear November day in Dallas. Tires screeched under the force of a heavy car turning too fast. The force of the turns and rapid acceleration was suffocating to Lyndon B. Johnson, who stared at the car floor just centimeters away from his face, with the full weight of a Secret Service agent pressing down on him. The car was racing away from the infamous motorcade seconds after the first shots rang out. It was the afternoon of the Kennedy assassination. It was rare that the President and Vice-President were both outside of Washington at the same time. And it was even more rare that the two were in the same motorcade. The country’s government was particularly vulnerable that day. It would not have been easy to act calmly in conditions like that.

Later, at Parkland Hospital in a hastily repurposed cubicle, Johsnon’s air turned to one that people close to him that day described as ‘calm’, ‘still’ and ‘quiet’. He was confronted with the most critical decisions of his life. Looking back, we know that the shots fired at Kennedy were the only ones aimed at the upper rungs of government that day. But at the time, there was credible reason to believe that Vice-President Johnson would be targeted as well. 

Amid the shock and panic, Secret Service agents attempted to do their jobs and urged Johnson to board a plane immediately to ensure maximum safety. Had he been overwhelmed by the moment, he might have accepted this logical advice. However, Johnson had the presence to think not of himself, but of Mrs. Kennedy. He rejected the plan and decided that he would not leave Dallas without the First Lady and the President’s body. 

Act calmly and command complexity

Under a screen of secrecy, Johnson’s party was about to make its exit from the hospital when he was forced to make another difficult decision. He was asked if the press should be informed of the President’s death. Without hesitation, he replied to the enquiring aide: “No. I think I had better get out of here and get back to the plane before you announce it. We don’t know whether this is a worldwide conspiracy, whether they are after me as well. . . . We just don’t know.” 

Still just hours after the traumatic event, now aboard Air Force One, Johnson coordinated the swearing of the oath for him to assume the Presidency. This was a complicated procedure, seeped in ambiguity, but one that was of primary importance and urgency. It was paramount that he showed the world continuity and legitimacy in the country’s highest office. Again, those who were on the plane later noted his calm and ability to command a complex situation with clarity. After having been in the range of bullets and then evacuated via high-speed getaway, Johnson had to find his compassion but also his command and calm. Just hours after the horrific catalyst that day, he came to terms with the fact that the President had died, which meant that he was now the Commander in Chief, and still managed to coordinate several complicated matters simultaneously.

 

How to act calmly

This is an extreme example that we can view through a retrospective lens to observe the importance of remaining calm under pressure. It is unlikely that Johnson experienced a state of internal calm during the tense and uncertain hours following Kennedy’s assassination. What history remembers, and what is important, is that he was able to act calmly.

Guidance from science and experience

I hope for this article to serve two purposes. I want to clarify that calmness can be cultivated despite the situation and despite your temperament. With practice, anyone can be calm in any situation, which is why the second aim of this article is to provide guidance on how to be calm in any situation. 

Let’s look at some tips, methods and guidance you can deploy to keep yourself engaged with stressors while performing calmly. The first comes from hard science, while the others come from experience.

Dr. Andrew Huberman is a professor of neurobiology and ophthalmology at Stanford University School of Medicine. His laboratory studies neural regeneration, neuroplasticity, and brain states such as stress, focus, fear, and optimal performance. He has a podcast and YouTube channel, where he strikes an excellent balance between the hard science of performance, without going too far over the heads of a generalized audience. 

I find that Huberman’s content is no-nonsense and highly trustworthy because he is a scientist above all else in search of the truth. Here’s a summary of what he has to say about being calm in any situation. 

The science of how to act calmly

Telling yourself to calm down does not work. In fact, it tends to exacerbate stress. The best thing you can do to reduce the severity of the stress response is activate the parasympathetic nervous system. According to Huberman, the fastest way to self-direct physiological calm is called the physiological sigh. We activate our respiratory systems involuntarily to reduce stress—in claustrophobic situations, for example—but we forget that we can also activate these systems voluntarily. The physiological sigh consists of one medium-to-long breath in, followed succinctly by one more short breath in, followed by a final long exhale.

Memento mori life tracker

Huberman explains and demonstrates this technique much more aptly than I can in the following short clip

This is an incredibly powerful tool because we can deploy it in real time. Mindfulness, yoga, meditation and other so-called Non-Sleep Deep Rest (NSDR) tools are excellent for the overall reduction of baseline stress. However, you cannot always perform those things on the spot. Things like gratitude have been shown to have a calming effect, but if you’re suddenly called upon in the real world to perform a task that scares you, there is no time to list twenty things for which you’re grateful. However, you can take a few seconds to do the physiological sigh without anyone noticing, and it will have the desired calming effect on your performance. 

Practical tips to help you act calmly

Although in some cases they are not supported by rigorous scientific research, I would still like to share with you some of my own personal tips for remaining calm in stressful situations. I work in online marketing for arguably the largest company in the world, so I have had the privilege to test these ‘how to stay calm’ tips against some fairly intense and stressful situations.

Prioritize relentlessly — if you’re operating in a dynamic or ever-evolving environment, it is crucially important to always know your top priority. This gives you singular focus from moment to moment, because the item at the top of the list is your sole concern. This also helps manage distractions, interruptions and changes to your plans. When something unexpected bubbles up, don’t let it derail your focus. Instead, write it down, ‘park’ it in a ‘to-be-captured’ area of your planner. Personally, I find it useful to examine my to-do list and the newly added items in my ‘to-be-captured’ section and re-order them based on the most current situation several times a day.

How to act calmly, how to be calm

Slow down, dramatically

Speak and move slowly — slowing your speech down just a bit is never a bad idea. It has a calming effect on yourself and your audience, it allows you to enunciate, and generally allows for more thoughtful communication. The same goes for movement. Slowing down your movement will result in fewer errors and a sense of calm and control. I recommend finding an introductory task and doing it incredibly slowly to set the tone for the subsequent tasks. For me, an introductory task that I perform ultra-slowly is entering my laptop’s login password. I am required to do this several times a day before I engage with more meaningful activity. Typing the password slowly allows me to set the pace and remind myself not to rush. 

Perspective — in particularly stressful situations, it can be useful to remind yourself of the bigger picture. Remind yourself of your ultimate, macro goals. Recalling that you work to support your family and not for the micro goals laid out for you today can have a grounding effect.

Compassion for focus

Serve others — interruptions are only distressful if we fail to realize that they are an opportunity to help someone. Usually interruptions or requests are opportunities to practice compassion. Shifting the focus from yourself to the service of your teammates or family members can broaden your perspective. It can serve as a reminder that being a good person is more important than ticking the box on every action item of the day. Plus, quite often, being of genuine and kind service to others makes you more indispensable. 

Breathe — if something stressful hits you out of the blue, and acting calmly will help you overcome it, go ahead and try the physiological sigh described above. This is a rapid calming method, but you can also try to use conscious breath throughout the day to maintain a calm baseline state. There’s never a bad time for a deep breath. We have written several pieces on meditation, rest, and breathing if you’d like to read more about these tools. 

No need to banish stress. Just act calmly

In stressful situations, it will never be possible to be fully calm. As was hopefully illustrated by the opening anecdote of Johnson’s transition from high-speed getaway to swearing in as President of the United States with just a few hours separating the two events, it’s more important to act calmly than to feel calm internally. We evolved a stress response for imperative reasons. We would not survive without feeling stress so it’s a good idea to remind yourself occasionally that stress is normal and necessary.

 

Just remember what is within your control and what is not. We can reach varying degrees of baseline calm through scheduled, medium-to-long term practices such as meditation. We can also leverage breathing techniques like the physiological sigh to rapidly lower our heart rate to tackle unexpected stressors as they arise. Perspective, planning and even compassion are equally excellent ways to navigate life with a calm baseline demeanor. A bit like a fairly common epithet that states ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’, I would like to propose my own in accordance with the theme of this article: ‘feel the pressure and act calmly’.

 

Sources

 

The Transition: Lyndon Johnson and the events in Dallas by Robert A. Caro. March 26, 2012

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2012/04/02/the-transition

 

Tools For Managing Stress & Anxiety: Huberman Lab Podcast #10

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ntfcfJ28eiU

 

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